Minutes of past meetings
11/14/2006 (Jess)
-
Delicious beverages:
an assortment of six packs
-
Delicious treats:
Doritos, carrots and dip, grapes, brownies (made by Oscar)
11/07/2006 (Alana)
10/24/2006 (Mara)
-
Delicious beverages:
Twisteds, Sam Adams, Cherry Coke
-
Delicious treats:
Brie and crackers, chips and dip, cookies
-
Sara
And P.S. your computer sounds like a lawn mower.
-
Jess
Oh, I've got one...it's all sheer!
-
Jess
Someone needs to remember to bring the neck tie.
-
Amy
Or we could just use a sock.
-
Erin
Or my bunny slipper.
-
Jess
Damn it. My toothbrush is in there!
-
Mara
Jess, you could use your elephant slipper!
-
Jess
No, no. They're different. The lawn mower has a lot of revving up; the shopping cart has a lot of taking off a shelf. (Complete with Jess demonstrating the different dance moves)
-
Jennie
Because I was sitting next to this guy one time.
-
Sara
Did he feel you up?
-
Jennie
Yeah, he did.
-
Sara
McPoohole (Albert Pujols)
-
Erin
Or a screwdriver. Screw me, baby!
-
Jess
Don't write it! It's a lie!! I just said it!
-
Alana
Oh! So that's how moguls work.
-
Erin
Isn't that Howie Mandel??
-
Sara
No!! It's Howie Long!
-
Jess
What is it with you and not knowing who people are? Gene Simmons or Richard Simmons??
-
Jess
She's got flab. You know, like lady flab. But Oscar, he's solid. His tummy is tight.
10/17/2006 (Sara)
-
Delicious beverages:
Twisteds and Coke products
-
Delicious treats:
apples with carmel and peanut butter dipping sauces, popcorn balls, chips, candy corns
-
Guy
No, I like things nice and tight.
-
Erin
This might be one of my last alcoholic beverages since I'm looking to get pregnant in Vegas.
-
Jennie
So now you're skipping the whole husband part?
-
Erin
No, no. I'm going to get married then get pregnant. I'm on a short timeline here.
-
Jennie
She's on the Ph.D track.
-
Erin
It's HOT-lanta in my book 'cause that's where Michael's at. Michael's gonna be my baby daddy.
10/10/2006 (Angela)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever beer assortment was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
salsa and chips, baba gannouj and pita bread, cookies
-
Jess
Do not fall for the elephants!! I've been scarred twice.
-
Jess
The Price is Right is my favorite!
-
Erin
What are you, 80??
-
Jess
Man! Stitchers should have gone to TPIR!
-
Jennie
What time is it on?
-
Jess
Eleven.
-
Erin
How do you know that?
-
Jess
I just watched it while I was on vacation.
-
Guy
You know TiVo could record it for you.
-
Jess
Oh no, I don't want to see it every day. It needs to be a special treat.
-
Jess
Well, let's argue because I'm ready.
-
Sudhi
That's because he's gay. He's flaming gay!
-
Sara
It's not pants, what's your problem?
-
Sara
He's got the chicken arms and the man boobs.
10/3/2006 (Erin)
-
Delicious beverages:
Coke products and Twisteds
-
Delicious treats:
homemade pudding pops, cookies, cheese and crackers, chips
-
Jess
What about a tough cat that's all straggly? What about a straggly cat that has a story to tell?
-
???
What does he work at?
-
Sara
Being a dick.
-
Guy
He doesn't do research; he does search.
-
Amy
You get matchy-matchy points.
-
Guy
Do you want any elephant on rabbit action?
-
Angela
I vote for elephant on rabbit action.
-
Amy
No you should take the picture and label it 'elephant on rabbit action'.
-
Angela
Guy! You need the rabbits!
-
Sara
Does he draw on his eyebrows?
-
Amy
I never thought I'd see a belly dancer dancing to the Eagles.
-
Jess
What's going on? I feel like I'm watching dirty TV.
-
Angela
Ok, Representative Foley.
-
Sara
That show is so freakin' boring! You watch people sort through their stuff and put it on shelves.
9/26/2006 (Sandra)
-
Delicious beverages:
tasty treats from the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
homemade guacamole and chips, cookies, pretzels and Chex mix, and peanut M&Ms
9/19/2006 (Jennie)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
homemade nachos, cupcakes, wafer cookies, cheese
-
Jennie
This stuff reads like stereo instructions.
-
Amy
Do they just write down sentences, throw them down on the ground, and then put them together? There is such a thing as paragraph structure.
-
Guy
I've spent entire days in bed. Ya know, work days.
-
Angela
She's like a duck. Her legs are just all over the place.
9/12/2006 (Christine)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
homemade guacamole, corn, bean and avocado dip, salsa, ice cream, cookies, raspberries
-
Jess
We're in log phase.
-
Christine
Amy said 'penis'. I catalogued it away in my brain.
-
Amy
No, no, no! Don't disappear!
-
Angela
I don't know where Beaver Island is.
-
Christine
I know someone who could take you to Beaver Island.
-
Christine
All I see is ERB-is there an H over there?
-
Jess
It's the anti-Albertelli's!
-
Guy
Do I need to add a black bar to that photo?
-
Angela
I think you should I was too distracted and couldn't see my scarf!
-
Jess
I wasn't talking to you. Didn't you hear? I was whispering.
-
Jess
If you don't win the money, you can certainly earn it.
-
Jess
Is there a lot of back end web design?
-
Angela
Have you even been to the back end of Beaver Island?
9/05/2006 (Amy)
-
Delicious beverages:
Coke products and Twisteds
-
Delicious treats:
cheese, crackers, and sausage, and fudge stripe and anti-stripe cookies
Differential Diagnosis for the House premiere:
- boredom
- scurvy
- There's a fungus among us.
-
Jess
There must be snausages in the hallway or something. At first, I thought it was duty, but...
-
Mara
It looks like an erect something. (Jess' elephant slippers)
-
Jess
We never got oriented. That's the problem! I've been disoriented for 6 years!
-
Megan
I'm a fan of the old school. (fudge stripe cookie)
-
Jennie
I think some of my brain cells just died.
-
Mara
I think he likes her boobs.
-
Christine
She doesn't want your balls.
-
Christine
I just said the look like schlong slippers.
8/29/2006 (Jess)
-
Delicious beverages:
lots of different things to choose from
-
Delicious treats:
pita chips and hummus, grapes, carrots and dip, lots and lots of Oreos
-
Megan
You know Guy, that's like the pregnancy test.
-
Jess
Is this an extravagant story to throw us off the pregnancy trail?
-
Alana
I don't care! Need a fix!! Need a fix!! (about the new LOTR DVDs)
-
Jess
He's my muse. (about Garth and swimsuits)
-
Mara
What's funny is the little black box over his eyes are bigger than the little black box over... Guy, is that a statement of some sort?
-
Jess
Why did I make that? I'm so weird!
-
Sara
Bring up the whores!
-
Jess
He brought up the Skank n' Roastin'.
-
Sara
I looooove pirate argyle!
8/15/2006 (Alana)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
homemade onion dip, homemade guacamole, spinach dip, bread, brownies
Vegas Names:
- Jess: Tippy Toes or Snake Eyes
- Sandra: Fast Eddie
- Christine: Thunder Down Under
-
Alana
I waited 7 years for Jason and Elizabeth to have sex, and they finally did! I am so excited-it's almost better than me actually having sex!!
-
Jess
I was right; Guy was wrong. Let the record show.
-
Jess
That was a bad move; demerits for Amy.
-
Guy
When did we start with that?
-
Megan
HQ doesn't give out merits, only demerits.
-
Christine
He's such a douche.
-
Christine
The opposite of pants is tits. (A web page asserting this)
8/8/2006 (Mara)
-
Delicious beverages:
beer and whatnot
-
Delicious treats:
Cookies!! And chips and dips.
-
Jess
I bought a little purse with a wiener dog on it.
-
Mara
There were 10 cute gay guys who stripped down to their underwearand then had water poured on them by the transvestite.
-
Mara
I've never seen a transvestite with a hard-on before.
-
Mara
Hey, what's rolling a hard six?
-
Jess
I don't want a lesbian wedding-that's gay.
-
Jess
No quotes for me tonight; that's a rule.
8/1/2006 (Sara)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge that was COLD!
-
Delicious treats:
homemade dips, homemade bread, and homemade ice cream (does anyone else sense the theme here??)
Alana was the only one who actually did any work this night.
White Elephant Christmas in July Gift Exchange
- Sara-mug, gloves, yarn caddie
- Jess-picture frame, turtle pot hanger
- Alana-candles
- Sandra-a Jess original one piece red, thong bathing suit (see pictures on website of Garth modeling)
- Erin-country music CDs
- Amy-Noah's ark
- Jennie-fun fur scarf, lipstick, and pineapple
- Guy-Barbie bobble head kitties, rubber chicken, fishing game
- Megan-Collon and ramune (Japanese food)
-
Amy
Lipstick-it's for windshield writing or self-beautification!
-
Jess
Hold it up! Hold it up!!
-
Sandra
No way!!
-
Amy
You have your own swimwear line! (See White Elephant Gift Exchange)
-
Guy
Random Japanese food...great!
-
Amy
Omigosh! An egg comes out of the chicken!
-
Jess
When you burn that, you can say, 'The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire.'
-
Jennie
I'll take it (the red bathing suit). I have friends who are getting married.
-
Sara
Garth will come out for $1 per person.
-
Amy
You need to mark it down as 'crocheted one-piece, slightly used.'
-
Garth
It's as uncomfortable as it looks.
-
Guy
Choking the chicken. I think I'm going to bring it to every Stitchers.
-
Sara
Kitty bobble head porn.
-
Erin
Pink mesh is best.
-
Guy
Collon is a tube with filling.
-
Megan
It's a hybrid cat powered vehicle.
-
Alana
It's a chicken that can suck its own... well, if that were even possible.
-
Sara
Quit palpating the chicken!
-
Alana
Oh! It's warm, too!
-
Megan
They should market eyebrow stencils.
-
Guy
Too many things come out of my chicken.
7/25/2006 (Angela)
-
Delicious treats:
All I remember is the fruit and ice cream
-
Christine
I thought you were supposed to do it through a sheet.
-
Christine
In the second grade, I was a member of the AIC otherwise known as assholes incorporated, and then in the fourth grade, I discovered boys.
-
Sara
Sleeves are only for fat people.
-
Christine
Mmmmmmm...bulimia. The wonders of going down.
-
Christine
Omigod! Someone stole that girl's hips!
-
Amy
It's like when Jess isn't around, Christine is the instigator.
-
Angela
Erin, this is off the record.
-
Angela
Ever since we started talking about bulimia, I'm like mrrrrr, mrahrahrah...
-
Erin
Are you going to puke?
-
Angela
Maybe.
-
Christine
Sandra is so 30 seconds ago (and now she shrieks-it's about the hair fork)
-
Christine
You sit there with your pen and cause mutiny and horror.
-
Amy
For that you should make her watch BSG.
-
Amy
I think you broke the dog.
7/18/2006 (Jennie)
7/15/2006 (Jess)
-
Delicious treats:
spinach and artichoke dip, carrots, fruits
special edition because Colleen's in town
7/11/2006 (Erin)
-
Delicious beverages:
Coke products and Twisteds
-
Delicious treats:
probably cookies, cheese and crackers
-
Erin
There's only one or two times you look like a perv. The rest of the time you look ok.
-
Amy
That's like the anti-yarmulke.
-
Sara
I want skull and crossbone sunglasses, totally.
-
Jennie
How is it possible to do worse that Courtney Love?
-
Sara
No! Frat boys are cute. They look like they came out of Abercrombie.
-
Jess
You could also give some cowboy guns like this one-enter sound effects.
-
Jess
Are these space pants? 'Cause my ass looks out of this world.
-
Update
Amy has not used the word 'turd poo' on a daily basis (see May 9, 2006 quotes)
-
Amy
He does look like a hobbit! A punk hobbit.
-
Jess
He's got Vanilla Ice brow.
-
Amy
I can do it with my TiFaux-aka my VCR.
7/4/2006 (Sandra)
Potluck 4th of July BBQ!!! (Erin: "Mmmmmm, I LOVE BBQs!!!")
Lots of sparkler fun.
Zombie wins for best firework even though it was a nice display!
6/27/2006 (Christine)
-
Delicious treats:
Fudge brownies and homemade guacamole.
Christine's inaugural
Secretary was not in attendance as Erin was at ENDO in Boston
6/20/2006 (Amy)
-
Delicious beverages:
Twisteds, etc. but it doesn't matter because there was ice cream!!!
-
Delicious treats:
ICE CREAM EXTRAVAGANZA!!!! (Erin: "Yes, I waited patiently for everyone to arrive before digging in. But I was the first to have seconds!")
-
Erin
What was that? That email that was something relevant to something like Michigan or something?
-
Amy
Take that Alex Trebek!
-
Jennie
They would have had to change the name to 'Top Model on Crutches'.
-
Angela
I like the sad music! They're playing the sad music.
-
Guy
Bring out your inner beauty, not your outer beauty.
-
Angela
You're 'Knitters' Next Top Model'! (I think this was when Guy was taking a picture of Angela's completed project that I was modeling...)
-
Erin
That was a real boob shot!
-
Guy
If this was porn, he'd be the fluffer.
-
Mara
Wouldn't you have bangs if you had a forehead like that?
-
Angela/Jennie
We've all determined that Guy is the heckler of the group.
6/13/2006 (Jess)
-
Delicious beverages:
An assortment in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
Chips and dips and brownies
-
Jess
Were you wearing a sweat colored dress?
-
Angela
No, I was wearing white-to make my friends laugh.
-
Jess
I think I'd be mesmerized. Do people stare??
-
Angela
No, no one stares. (at her nude honeymoon location)
-
Christine
A piranha ravaged my hooters.
-
Angela
We had a Vegas-style wedding in Livonia.
-
Sara
He wants the City kitty back!
-
Angela
It's not really puke. It's a doggy grassball. I'm like, are you not getting enough fiber in your diet??
-
Erin I'm being forced to put this story in here. I think it was much funnier when I told it, though. And, no, I'm not making this up nor am I crazy.
-
Erin
A squirrel chased me the other day.
-
Jess
What? Seriously?
-
Erin
Yes! I was coming out of MSII, and I noticed three squirrels by the bike racks. Then one started coming at me, and I thought it was just crossing to the other plants. But then it started coming after me faster and faster, and then it followed me across the street. I had to start running. I couldn't wait to get to the door of the parking structure, so I could shut the door.
-
Amy
Was it at the door?
-
Erin
Yes!!
-
Christine
I have an awesome squirrel story, too.
-
Erin
Did you get chased, too?
-
Christine
No.
-
Erin
Dammit.
-
Jess
Down under wax.
-
Unknown
You're more likely to be attacked by a domesticated pig than by a shark.
6/6/2006 (Megan & Guy)
- Delicious beverages:
-
Delicious treats:
Trader Joe's explosion!!! (Erin: "Oh, how I love that store!")
Om went for a field trip to the yard. He ate a lot of grass-it was fascinating, really.
-
Amy
I sorta, semi.
-
Guy
I really like the piss cola. (piscola)
-
Jess (about Oscar)
In case you didn't notice, I'm wasting away.
-
Amy
Merlin thinks he is so ferocious with the birds.
-
Jess
Oscar has a new arch-enemy, Petunia.
-
Mara
So finally they decided the best thing to do was to stab it with a hypodermic needle! (the story of the flying pig traveling!!)
-
Megan
It's a good think you didn't stuff it with little plastic bags full of....
-
Jess
Crack!
-
Amy
Actually, last time I flew home, I took my mom's stuffed frog home...
-
Erin
did they think that was a drug mule?
-
Megan
My mom had a cat that would suck on her neck while she slept. When she woke up she's have a giant cat hickey on her neck.
-
Guy
Knitting is fun-it's like a contact sport.
-
Guy
He's going to hook me up with some quality X-Men.
5/9/2006 (Sara)
-
Delicious beverages:
Twisteds, beers, whatever else
-
Delicious treats:
Delicious homemade treats (I can't remember the specifics) with garlic (I remember this!!!) and cookies!!
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- allergic to breast milk
- obsessive-kill-your-baby disease (a.k.a. post-partum depression)
- bird flu
-
Sara
She looks a little Ozzy Osborne.
-
Jess
The "lettin'-himself-go-Elvis"; gluttonous Elvis.
-
Sara
The 'make-it-work' badge.
-
Amy
They have the judges on happy juice tonight. Ok, maybe Simon's not on happy juice.
-
Amy
I can't see anything.
-
Jess
They are probably blurred out.
-
Amy
They're on time-delay! Quick!! Airbrush them out!! (Chris' see-through shirt)
-
Jess
Would you say he takes it to the limit in this high octane thriller?? (Tom Cruise in M:I:3)
-
Jess
It's a slow, upstart, but wait until I get my 'rocket edge'.
-
Sara
Oh, it takes two to get syphilis.
-
Jess
We're 'these people' now!?
-
Jess
A never nude!! (people who shower in their swim suits)
-
Sara
He copied 'Casanova' which is a piece of turd poo.
-
Jess
What's turd poo?
-
Sara
I don't know, but it's worse than poo...so don't rent it.
-
Erin
Because it's turd poo.
-
Jess
No, no, no. It's one word, or maybe it's hyphenated. (turd poo vs. turdpoo vs. turd-poo)
-
Amy
I'm going to try to use it once a day!
5/2/2006 (Angela)
-
Delicious beverages:
An assortment of beers
-
Delicious treats:
Homemade quesadillas
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- bullet poisoning
- St. Vitas dance
- lead poisoning
Apparently there were no humorous quotes that night-Erin was busy helping Sandra cut out patches
4/25/2006 (Jennie)
-
Delicious beverages:
Whatever was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
There were all sorts of candy to choose from.
-
1st Stitchers' Motto:
If someone asks you if you made it, you say 'YES!!'
-
2nd Stitchers' Motto:
Assembly Sucks!
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- botulism
- Jesus-induced paralysis
- tetanus
- charlie horse
- dehydration
- giardia
- clearly, not normal
- argon, I mean radon poisoning
- syphilis
- herpes
-
Jess
If someone asks you, you say 'yes'.
-
Amy
Jess, did you make that sweater?
-
Jess
Yes, yes, I did.
-
Erin
Sara, did you make that sweater?
-
Sara
Yes, and then I sewed the Abercrombie tag in it.
-
Angela
I made a triangle by accident last night.
-
Jess
I should have listened to Megan about assembling sweaters.
-
Megan
How'd that go?
-
Jess
Sucky, suck, suck, suck!!!
-
Angela
I showed Sudhi a wedding ring as a joke, and now he wants it.
-
Jess
Was it a man rock? Please tell me it was a man rock!
-
Angela
Someone in wardrobe doesn't like her.
-
Amy
So Paula is set on 'rambly' tonight.
-
Sara
But the good news is that she's not mic'ed well tonight.
-
Jennie
They should make anti-tangle yarn.
-
Guy
Let's pickle Pickler!!
-
Jess
Do boys get syphilis?
-
Jess
She wouldn't write it down. She only writes it down if it makes me sounds like a perv. (Erin: And, Jess, for the record, I only write it down if it's FUNNY!!!)
-
Angela
Maybe she's got it in for you.
-
Amy
Jess is on a poopy thing tonight.
-
Angela
I should stick with clear liquids in bottles.
-
Jennie
This is why I should have sippy cups around
-
Guy
I don't facilitate; I make things harder.
-
Amy
Guy-induced, how about that?
-
Guy
I'm not an inducer; I'm a conductor.
-
Guy
I often scream the entire time I'm in Meijer, too.
-
Megan
I don't let him sit in the cart, though.
-
Jess
Do you ride in the car cart?
-
Amy
Wow!! That's super open-weave!
-
**Entire conversation about the "new" crocheted bikini-Angela's making it, Jess was modeling it and then the conversation turned to waxing.
4/18/2006 (Erin)
-
Delicious beverages:
Most any Coke product in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
Cookie extravaganza: Chocolate chip cookies, turtle cookies, oatmeal raisin cookies, sugar cookies with icing, and then a mix of healthy stuff just to balance out the sugar.
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- lesbian syphilis
- REALLY bad pink eye; acute pink eye
- late onset familial insomnia
- Jess: It clearly has something to do with being a lesbian; lesbian rabies
- aneurysm
- pineal gland disorder
- circadian rhythm disorder
- vampirism
- chronic DIC
- spider bite
- the plague
-
Amy
Jess, I'm going to make you a purse. Just kidding. The book lies! LIES!
-
Angela
I'm a crocheting fool!
-
Amy
What are you making, an afghan?
-
Angela
I guess so.
-
Jennie
Guess what I'm making?
-
Christine
Isn't he the 'Man Clad in Satin'?
-
Christine
Anyone who calls me 'cregina' automatically gets called 'mangina'.
-
Jess
Sara's gonna be a Mormon!
-
Sara
Only if they have polygamy for women in Utah!
-
Angela
It's called polyandry.
-
Christine
What color is that?!
-
Jess
It's Sal-mon. (pronounce the L like Kelly Pickler!)
-
Sara
It would've been better if she wore a manx with it.
-
Jess
What if you knew she turded on the floor?
-
Angela
Well, I have a dog that would eat the turd, and then the circle of life is complete.
-
Amy
They must have the sparkly eye filter on him.
-
Jess
I like him. I think he's kinda dopey. (Elliot Yamin)
-
Christine
There's someone in our lab who you might be interested in. You'd look really good in his car.
-
Christine
I saw the kickest ass skirt the other day.
-
Sara
She doesn't even know what half of these words mean. (Kelly Pickler)
-
Jess
Maybe it's her vocabulary lesson.
-
Amy
Maybe it's part of her tutoring.
-
Jess
Her eyes look different.
-
Amy
See! Sparkly eye filter!
-
Jess
No, they look more round or something.
-
Sara
She's wearing body glitter.
-
Erin
Well, when I wear body glitter, I only wear it on my chest. You gotta put it wear the guys are looking. You know they aren't looking anywhere else.
-
Jess
She's not writing any of this down...not a word.
-
Jess
Richard Simmons vs. Gene Simmons (ok, I didn't exactly get the quote, but I know we were revisiting this conversation...)
-
Erin
I love cupcakes, too!!
-
Jennie
Maybe I should do my prelims on the lesbian syphilis gene.
-
Guy
Yeah, I like that one. It's got good looking kidneys. (about cat kidney transplants)
-
Sara
Giving a liver to lesbians is like having a baby...
4/11/2006 (Sandra)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
Easter candy explosion!
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- congenital syphilis
- a REALLY bad case of pink eye
Sandra has recovered from the plague!! Unfortunately, there aren't many quotes tonight because I actually had a purpose--I was busy helping Sandra make goodie bags!
-
Sara
On paper? I write in the dirt with a stick.
-
Amy
Maybe he's doing reverse juju on her.
-
Sandra
Luna has a few suitors in the neighborhood. She does slut-it up a bit.
-
Sandra (about Matt)
He's gonna start 'Unknitters' where they buy cheap sweaters and undo them.
-
Amy
I was hoping she was gonna die.
-
Guy
Fake crab is KAY-RAB.
-
Jess
Oscar does wind sprints all night long. He's in training.
4/4/2006 (Megan & Guy)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge
-
Delicious treats:
whatever anyone brought for the food table
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- syphilis
- allergic to peanuts
- rabies
One year Anniversary!
Megan and Guy "substituted" so that the Stitchers would have a place to congregate since Sandra had the plague.
-
Amy
At least she sounds like a cat. Mine sounds like a bird half the time.
-
Christine
Ew! You just rammed your butt into my foot.
-
Sara
He's got the Sally Jesse Raphael glasses on. Those glasses are between Elton John and Sally Jesse Raphael.
-
Sara
Just because you got to church doesn't mean you can't swear.
-
Jess
But it means you can't eat the anniversary pie. (It was a cookie pie.)
-
Jess
It's like the poop alarm!
-
Guy
There's poop on the floor.
-
Guy
I have a poo story. I cleaned up the poo in the yard from the winter. I had 4 Hillers bags full. Well, some of it might have been turd-shaped dirt...
-
Guy
I'm trying to decide if I should celebrate a momentous event in my life on August 2nd. I will be 1 billion seconds old.
-
Sara
You should put a note on it: 'only for kids with short, round feet'.
-
Megan
You must be a terrorist.
-
Amy
This evening on 'Stitchers': The wonders of TiVo.
-
Jess
You should send your wedding invitations as Evites.
-
Guy
I use 'SpamAssassin'.
-
Amy
Oh my gosh! I'm gonna have a thumb!
3/28/2006 (Amy)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge--Cokes and Twisteds
-
Delicious treats:
ooey-gooey rice krispie treats and other snacks, Sara even brought us food from her committee meeting!
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- syphilis
- allergic to wife
-
Anonymous
I call him 'rotten crotch'.
-
Angela
Don't worry, Jesus is still invited.
-
Sara
I think I'm done knitting tonight. I transferred my stitches onto two needles--that's it.
-
Jennie
I think he beats Constantine in smarminess.
-
Christine
Tricera breast.
-
Sara
Oh people always pretend to be someone they're not when they're dating.
-
Sara/Jess??
Who'd you pretend to be?
-
Guy
I dressed nicely.
-
Sara
Did you wear pants?
-
Jess
I'm thinking about getting Addie a tummy tuck. It's just dragging on the floor.
-
Megan
Get her a girdle.
-
Guy
She's gonna get rug burns pretty soon.
-
Sara
It's like gin rummy. Where you hold all your cards until the end and you screw 'em over.
-
Sara
Sandra has a stuffing song!! (like Erin has a cupcake song)
-
Sara
It really was rotten crotch. (vagina poisoning on House)
-
Sara
Maybe you'll have a bad day tomorrow.
-
Amy
You'll never meet Jason, so it doesn't matter...I can tell you.
-
Jess
Who is Amy? (Star Wars kid)
-
Jess
You got a lot of presents today. Happy Wedding!
3/21/2006 (Jess)
-
Delicious beverages:
beers and twisteds
-
Delicious treats:
Hershey's minis with candy flakes in the center and Cracker Jacks (what was YOUR prize?!)
-
Angela's Cracker Jack joke
Why didn't the teddy bear eat?
-
Megan
Because he was anorexic.
-
Answer
Because he was stuffed.
-
Megan
What was that? Reverse psychology? He doesn't want to look desperate, so he acts like a prick?
-
Jess
There needs to be an emergency release where the sides collapse.
-
Guy
I wonder which has more deaths
-
Megan
Are there more buckets or sharks in the world?
-
Amy
Buckets.
-
Amy
Are your clocks the same or are they in different time zones?
-
Jess
Ummm...they don't have batteries in them.
-
Amy
Well, I don't know what time it is!
-
Jess
BOOB-LAY, BOOB-LAY, BOOB-LAY (Michael Bublé official website.)
-
Erin
If you say it again, I'm going to write it down.
-
Amy
Say it again! Say it again!
-
Jess
BOOB-LAY!!
-
Angela
Needlemaster!
-
Guy
They don't make them slippery enough. Never slippery enough.
-
Sara
Did he say: 'P.S. You are the hottest person in the department.'?
-
Angela (to Guy)
Are you a Fanilow?
-
Amy
Ew...he's still smarmy.
-
Guy
Survivor Bridesmaid
-
Guy
Homer, you've got it set on 'whore'. (Quoting from a Simpsons episode)
-
Guy
Maybe she was a manx.
-
Sara
His eyes are dead tonight.
3/14/2006 (Megan & Guy)
-
Delicious beverages:
whatever was in the fridge and quite the selection at that
-
Delicious treats:
Trader Joe's explosion: mini tacos, mini quiches, chocolate covered pretzels, strawberries, cream puffs, and cookies
Luna made a surprise visit!! She and Slobber Dog had a tug of war. Megan had told us that Guy and the TiVo had a long heart-to-heart and both had come to accept the fact that they would have to watch Idol and House. Guy was sure to give Idol three thumbs down!
-
Sandra
No more cream puffs for you, Luna.
-
Jennie
Maybe she's just going through withdrawal.
-
Sara
His eyes are totally dreamy.
-
Sandra
Porn industry, really? Maybe if it were Dickler.
-
Guy
We could do a replay. Slow motion thrusting.
-
Ryan Seacrest
Kevin is my heaven; Simon is my hell.
-
Mara
I just found out there was attendance up there. I don't think that's a good thing if Didi finds out.
-
Jennie
Wow! This is interesting conversation tonight: smarminess and sagginess.
-
Megan
He said 'He has feeling and it's coming from his soul.' Is that a nice way of saying he has personality?
-
Amy
Do not try me gel box. You do not want to mess with me. (what Jack Bauer from '24' would say if he were working in a lab)
-
Mara
He's got pubes on the.... (referring to an AI contestant's soul patch)
3/7/2006 (Mara)
-
Delicious beverages:
an assortment of beers and twisteds
-
Delicious treats:
lots of tempting yummy looking cookies, crackers and dipping things
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- epiletical seizure
- psychotic
- lead poisoning
- neutical (testicular implants)
- syphilis
-
Steve
Now when I want to avoid someone, I just drop something off the shelf and 'Oh, I gotta go!'
-
Sandra
That's something you do on a knitting machine.
-
Jess
What's a knitting machine?
-
Mara
That's what Guy is!
-
Steve
It's not just pimpin' that ain't easy. (referring to the song that won at this years Academy Awards)
-
Jess
I wish my name were Uma.
-
Mara
People tend to be a little tight at first, but then they get used to it, and then they start to enjoy it. (about Steve learning to knit)
-
Mara
Eww! Randy what are you on?
-
Steve
He's tapping it.
-
Guy
I wanna dominate your spirit.
-
Alana
Is this your first project?
-
Amy
No. I've made a purse that's not finished and a hat that doesn't fit.
-
Sandra
Have you downloaded any podcasts? The Buffy ones are horrible, but a better than silence. That's my review.
-
Amy
Hey, I was getting all of my stuff stolen!
-
Erin
But I was going to wear it!!
-
Amy
How do you know I don't? (referring to our White Elephant gift exchange and the coveted bikini)
-
Guy
I'm going with psychotic.
-
Mara
One hour of fake balls?
2/28/2006 (Sara)
-
Erin
'Monster note taker' was not present (and contrary to popular belief, I was NOT on a date), and to the best of my knowledge there was novice-notetaker that evening.
2/21/2006 (Angela)
-
Delicious beverages:
an assortment of beers, soda and juice
-
Delicious treats:
yummy homemade nachos and fruit sorbet
-
Angela
I want to buy a squirrel so he'll learn to kill squirrels. (about her dog Zena)
-
Angela
She's dancing to Madonna? (an Olympic ice skater)
-
Megan
The orchestral version.
-
Angela
...of 'Like a Virgin'. No wonder Canada hasn't won a medal since 1988!
-
Guy
Too bad we don't have TiVo--we could just rewind to see the part that she sucked at.
-
Guy
Second place!! For the 'sucker'. I mean, I could skate better than that.
-
Megan
I'd like to see that.
-
Amy
Let's go down an ice tube head first. (Who thinks the Skeleton in the Olympics is a good idea?!)
-
Erin
It was called slutty Vampire.
-
Amy
Oh! Was I just retarded? Yes, yes, I was.
-
Guy
I love the Pepcid AC...so tasty!
-
Amy
Which Canadia is that? (yes, Canadia...you know, our northern neighbors)
-
Amy
I was going to say it's a North American race, but somehow 'Canadia' came out.
-
Amy
It's like Pepto Bismol on ice.
-
Angela
Why are there so many damn Italians here?
-
Amy
And then the Italians showed up. (making fun of the commentators--apparently they are unaware that the Olympics are IN Italy!)
-
Megan
We've heard about this shroud for years, and now we don't know where it's from. (on the controversy of Turin vs Torino...which is correct?)(Guy Notes; a detailed analysis can be found on this blog
-
Guy
I didn't think the luge is the #1 reason for death in this country.
-
Angela
Oh, he's dead--was he a luger?
-
Guy
Germans rock at sliding down ice tubes. (women's bobsled)
-
Angela
Having her be a note taker has created a monster. (Erin Notes: maybe this should be the next poll, Guy...)
-
Erin
Don't you think if you were going to the Olympics that you'd put in clean shoelaces? (when one of the ice skaters didn't have her skates covered and you could see her dirty laces)(Guy Notes: New laces are stretchy and can thus loosen up mid-performance.)
2/14/2006 (Jennie)
-
Delicious beverages:
help yourself to the fridge loaded with quite a variety
-
Delicious treats:
Can anyone say sugar overload?! I think Jennie bought out the store with her selection of V-day candies!
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- Syphilis (of course!
- I'll just go with the Clap. -Guy
- He's got 'lack of banana' disease. -Jess
Whether you were boycotting the holiday or celebrating, we all indulged on the Valentine's Day candy selection. Surprise! Little to our knowledge each and every one of us had a Valentine: GUY! He brought us ALL flowers!
-
Jess
I have to give my brain a bath.
-
Amy
Give it a bubble bath--it's Valentine's Day! (referring to the V-day episode of The Office)
-
Erin
I love cupcakes. I love cupcakes! (singing to herself/the cupcakes)(Erin Notes: ok, I'm STILL laughing at this--and I wasn't even drunk--must have been all of Jennie's candy!!)
-
Jess
Whoa! That's how you get kitty barf!
-
Mara
OH!! Cupcakes!
-
Jess
Erin loves them.
-
Sara
She was singing to them by the trash can.
-
Amy
I love cupcakes, too.
-
Guy
Well, that's where you keep the junk in the trunk--in the trunk! In the backseat isn't as good.
-
Jess
That was the most decadent 'mmmmm' ever.
-
Amy
She REALLY loves NERDS. (Erin Notes: I think this must have been about me, too...what was wrong with me that night?!?!?)
-
Guy
I like getting tight with a bunch of guys. It's pretty cool.
-
Sara
Eat some humble pie.
-
Jess
Erin, how much candy have you had?
-
Erin
I don't know. Are we having a contest again? (referring to the candy eating contest Jess & Erin had at Megan and Guy's over Halloween)
-
Jess
Yeah!
-
Erin
I threw away my wrappers to conceal the evidence.
-
Megan
That's a good idea!
-
Jess
Well, someone definitely has had a lot of candy....and cupcakes. (opening the trash can and seeing all the wrappers--I swear, it wasn't all mine!!)
-
Erin
I've only had two of those!!
-
Sara
We should could how many times they say 'Stargate' like in a drinking game.
-
Erin
And we can do candy shots--eat the Runts.
-
Sara
Two for every time.
-
Jess
He's singing into his water bottle--that's HOT! (one of the cowboy contestants)
-
Mara
You even have a piano to stay in tune!
-
Guy
This book is agnostic. (a knitting book)
-
Simon Cowell
Why don't we have--yes, no, maybe, and weird? (referring to grouping the contestants for the big cut)
-
Jess
It's the Seacrest fake-out. It's patented.
-
Jess
Doesn't Laffy Taffy usually have jokes? Where are the jokes?!
-
Guy
It's the boring Laffy Taffy.
-
Jess
Oh! I found it!
2/7/2006 (Alana)
-
Delicious beverages:
an assortment of 2L Coke products
-
Delicious treats:
a cheese smorgasbord (which was your favorite?) and V-day candies
-
Differetial Diagnosis for "House":
- syphilis
- mind controlling parasite
- spinal tumor
- lead poisoning
- ectopic pregnancy
-
Erin
Fudge, but different. (referring to the chocolate cheese, yes, chocolate cheese)
-
Jess & Alana
Interesting. Fudge, but cheese.
-
Jess
Is there a pattern on the next page that says 'unflattering wrap'?
-
Guy
I want the short story! I checked the 'short story' box!
-
Guy
What the TiVo watches--we all watch. (trying to get out of watching American Idol)
-
Guy
I can be discretionist.
-
Ryan Seacrest
They kept on coming...and they kept on sucking.